Tonight, as I nursed my little boy before he went to bed, I thought back on the incredible journey of the whole breast feeding. Amazing the changes that came from the unknowledgeable first time mother to a seasoned pro!
Before I even delivered, I promised myself I would go at least six months breastfeeding my baby. This was just as much for his benefit for mine; the health benefits I received are amazing (i.e., some protection from breast cancer). The benefits he gained were undeniable; research continues to find more immunities, long term benefits, and just general better health for those children breastfed for at least the first six months of their lives. How could I, an educated healthcare professional in the pediatric field, deny my son?
First mistake: I did not see (either my fault unknowingly or just a lapse in the hospital's system) a lactation consultant prior to discharge after having my Goober. Now, soon as the 24 hour time limit hit, I was ready to go, and this could of hindered me seeing someone. However, I still should of saw someone, especially since they have the services available. No one asked us, nor did we ask. I am willing to share the blame. So rule one for new mothers: prior to discharge, request/demand to see a lactation consultant prior to discharge!
Coming home, I thought Goober and I were lucky. He was eating (at least, it appeared to be -- my lucky husband changed the tarry diapers) and seemed content. It pained a little when he latched on, and I - along with my mother - thought this was natural. After all, my poor nipples have never been used in such a manner! Within the next two days, when we noticed that he did not have any wet diapers, and I was becoming more and more engorged (with the pain to match), my mother and I quickly came to the conclusion that he wasn't eating properly. A call to a great friend who was the most recent to have nursed gave us some tips to try, and when he finally got it, and was feeding, I never saw him so content. How long had I starved my child unknowingly? If only someone in the hospital had taken some more time to check his latch, to make sure I knew the signs to look for to insure a proper latch...
Second mistake: It should not hurt to nurse after the first couple of days, and it *shouldn't* send ripples of pain throughout your body. This is most definitely a sign of improper latch! I let this go on for WEEKS. I did not want to admit defeat, that I was doing something wrong, or I was afraid to give up. So I continued to nurse through the pain. My poor husband... he took the brunt of my pain, and what a man, he took it, too! So rule two: see someone if pain continues, and quickly!
I called the lactation consultant at the hospital I delivered at. She was prompt in her return phone call, and we scheduled a session. Let me tell you, that was the best $20 we spent EVER. Within second of Goober latching on, she had diagnosed our issues. Once she fixed it, he latched on correctly, and there was *no* pain as he nursed. None. I went home a happy woman, relieved to realize I can do this, and it is completely okay to admit I need help. I was once told breast feeding is natural, but does not come naturally.
We live in a society where it is not okay to nurse your child in public, even with the laws to say it is. Women are taught to hide their breasts, and they are sex objects. This is so wrong, and this is why the United States has the lowest breast feeding rates in the world. Thankfully, with education, women are making the choice to breast feed, and only as we allow it to be natural and not "dirty" will it become more natural. How can I learn if no one breast feeds, or hides it? My niece was breast fed. Her mother educated her daughter, did not hide her from it, and so I didn't. She would check under my cover (the first couple of times I tried to use it before I abandoned it) to make sure her "boyfriend" was eating his mother's milk. Even her baby dolls got the benefits of their mother's education -- no bottles for them! (If anyone tries to tell her that it is not natural for her to feed her baby that way, I will be in line to tell them otherwise.)
Now that I am almost twenty months -- well past my six month goal! -- into breast feeding my son, I realize I have become an advocate. A few of my friends have had children since I, and I have been some of their source of information. I have been there, I am not at all embarrassed to admit my mistakes, and I have the medical research to back me up and saying this is the best way to feed our children. Who can say no to decrease rates of childhood obesity, type II diabetes, heart disease, etc, for our children?!
As I prepare for the birth of my second child in the next couple of months, I cannot wait to share my milk with him/her. To give my child the absolute best start in life, and to have the incredible bond that develops between a mother and her child as she nurses. All the cuddle time, the looks of content, the snuggles, the kisses... even now, as we are slowly, slowly, slowly weaning Goober, I treasure every moment that he nurses. I do not rush him, and I love how he strokes my cheeks, smiles as he nurses, and the kisses I receive. I love knowing exactly what he wants too, now that he signs "nurse"/"milk" to me as he runs up with a smile on his face, knowing that most likely, he will receive. It is a constant source of comfort to him, a soft place to land, and when he is sick, the absolute only thing he wants to eat/drink. It will be a sad day for me when he is completely weaned.
Well, I will be done (for now) on this subject... it is an incredible journey I am still enjoying, and I hope to enjoy for a great while with baby two...
Tomorrow... to make sure I sit down and write it, an update on Goober at 19/20 months (much needed for his baby book, I will have to transcribe what I do write into his book, when I get the new one)...
For now, I remain ... E :)
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